2016-04-17 Try to change jealousy into a rejoicing attitude

Teaching by Khenpo Kalsang Nyima on the 17th of April 2016 I hope, trust and pray that all of you dharma friends are feeling well and practicing the Dharma in the everyday life. All of us wish happiness and don’t wish suffering in the same way. Yet, there is a difference in actually knowing how to engage in the cause which achieves happiness and making effort in the method of averting suffering. In the world there are millions of people, yet there is a difference in their financial situation. They might be in the same environment, but there is a difference in their way of thinking. There is an immense difference in their mental happiness. There is a difference in being able to follow properly a correct teacher who points out what to adopt and discard. Even if one follows a correct teacher, there is a great difference in one’s ability to be actually able to practice the holy Dharma. Independence on that, there is a difference in the extent of difficulties which are encountered and extent of happiness which is attained. There is a variety of measures of an open, spacious attitude. We are Buddhist followers to whom the wise and compassionate Buddha turned the incredible wheel of Dharma in dependence on different mental dispositions and states of mind of sentient beings. All those teachings are intended for us to abandon the attachment, aversion, ignorance, pride and jealousy, etc. which are in our mental continuum and to develop love, compassion, bodhichitta and the view of emptiness. In the everyday life in society many problems and difficulties are encountered because of jealousy. In a particular family when a husband and wife live together, due to jealousy the house hold experiences lots of problems. Usually, just by being a human being, one without a fault is nowhere to be found. There is no faultless human being. Besides the Buddha Shakyamuni, there is no one who doesn’t have faults. There is only a difference in the faults themselves.

When jealousy arises there is great pain in the mind and due to thinking repeatedly about the jealousy the body and mind both have a sensation like being thrown into the fire. While being motivated with jealousy and conversing with someone else, the speech is unpleasant and many harsh words are spoken , in dependence on that it hurts greatly your beloved dear partner. Then, the deep mutual love, closeness and friendliness gradually decline and finally the family disperses. From one point of view the jealousy was the direct cause for that. Yet, in reality this situation was created by many conceptual exaggerated thoughts. This is because from life times without beginning we have that habit and naturally the mind of jealousy arises with neither effort nor exertion. In the everyday life in human society people experience great difficulties and hardships due to this.

In addition, these days, followers of the Buddha Dharma, practitioners, due to jealousy and competitiveness between religious sects, even though they are all Buddhists, compete regarding name, power, wealth, disciples, etc. By thus, they accumulate sever misdeeds and create great damage to the teachings of the Buddha.

There is also jealousy generated by a Lama towards a disciple and a disciple towards the Lama. Due to that the Samaya (commitment) between master and disciple is violated and they both accumulate severe non virtuous negative action which will lead to the birth in the miserable realms such as hell. Whether jealousy arises in the context of either Dharma or mundane activity, great difficulty is encountered. Therefore, it is important to make effort in the antidote of jealousy, rejoicing. Jealousy arises because one cannot rejoice in the other persons’ fame, power, well being, love, etc. The root cause of that is attachment. Because the name, fame, wealth, love and everything another person has seems to be good and appealing, existing as true, one thinks thoughts such as: “I should only have such power and the other person shouldn’t” or “I should only be the owner of that and not another person”. The jealousy arises due to very strong ego-clinging.

There is a lot explained about the antidote to jealousy, a rejoicing attitude. Similarly, there is much explained about altruism, love, compassion and bodhichitta towards other sentient beings. We need to become accustomed to the mind of rejoicing and committing to place all other sentient beings in the final enlightenment, as well as promising to protect sentient beings from the suffering in the miserable realms of Samsara. When another person attains associates, fame, wealth, power and love if you despise that with jealousy, then it serves as a contrary to bodhichitta, the mind of enlightenment, a contrary to compassion, a contrary to the practice of loving kindness to others. If because of jealousy we get angry and argue with others, it contradicts our refuge vow of abandoning violence towards others. Similarly, it opposes the practice of patience. In actuality, we generated faith in the Buddha Dharma and pray every day for the benefit of sentient beings, but when engaging, instead of benefitting others, if we are unable to bear the good situation which the other person has attained and despise

while being jealous, it not only completely opposes the Buddha Dharma, but also during the time the jealousy is generated you have anxiety and difficulty in your mind, physical sickness and pain, all your beloved ones drift further and further away from you until finally in the world there is no one to be trusted and you feel lonely. This is not someone else’s fault but rather that of your severe jealousy and your severe ego clinging. By knowing this you will be able to reverse the jealousy and practice rejoicing, bodhichitta, love and kindness for others and cultivate patience. This is very important and meaningful, I think.

Thank you